~"Pain is not more when something bad happens with us, it's intensity is much larger when it happens with the one we love, that hurts a lot more."
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It was almost 10 at Night. It was my first day back home and I wanted to see her. It was quite late and I was surprised why she wasn't back home.
I was worried.
I asked Pandey Ji about it, but all he said was that she comes late only these days.
Oh God!
What is up with her? Where was she? I was getting restless. I took her number, the one she had changed, I called her up so many times, but no answer.
And finally around 10, she entered. Something was definately wrong with her. I wanted this bad dream to end soon. But it wasn't just a dream, the harsh reality was hitting me hard. Saanvi came home, drunk. I was shocked. She was drunk.
What the hell was wrong with her?
I saw her from a distance. She was beautiful, still she was, but something from inside was turning that beauty into a devil. She was destroying herself. She was drunk. I can't believe it. This girl, my Saanvi was drunk.
She was stumbling. The alcohol driving in her veins was making her do so. She could barely walk properly. She couldn't walk properly in those high heels, it was difficult for her. I went closer.
And she about to fall, that was when I took her in my arms.
"Leave me Aryan. Don't hold me. Let go of me.", she was protesting.
Her eyes were burning with that fluid that made her high. I had never seen anything this bad in my entire life.
A part of me broke forever, broke beyond limits, even the touch of her love would never be able to repair that broken part.
"Saanvi, relax. Come, sit here. Just calm down. I need to know what is up with you. This is not what you are, definately not the girl I know.", I tried to calm her down.
"I will do this. I like this. I'm no more answerable to you. You and me, we cannot ever be one. Let me live ny loge, my way. You enjoy. You and your money, Aryan. We are worlds apart.", she said.
"No Saanvi. Why all this? why can't we be one? We can be. You just, we just have to try. I love you. Seriously. Stop thinking all this. And what lead you to drink..look at your condition. This is not what you are. Who persuaded you to do all this?", I questioned.
"Some people who can keep thier promises and not people like you. You are so freaking rich. It won't even matter to you. You would get loads of those pretty rich girls and your parents would be happy to see you with them. And listen, you got no right over me. I have work to do in the morning. I have college to go to. I'm not stinking rich as you. We will talk about all this shit tomorrow, even though it's of no use. Move on with life Aryan.
Oh, I forgot, move on with money sweetheart."
And she went.
And her Words took away all the strength I had built up over all this time. She deprieved me of her again. She was destroying herself, unknowningly she was finishing me off.
Her words cut open my already injured soul. Life defeated me once again. Stuck there at the threshold of my life, I didn't know who was at fault, whom to curse, whom to ask forgiveness from. All I knew was, my happy life turned it's face towards me. The shadows of darkness quenched away the happiness out me. My happy memories of her, they all were fading away. Maybe this is what happens when you love someone more than your own self. Maybe the one you name your soul to, is meant to crush it, forever.
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They say right,
"Sometimes the person you can take a bullet for, is the one who is behind the trigger."
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